The Longest Hour
by Ysabet
Summary: A sequal to 'The Window': Conan tells Ran a very important secret--- and the consequences outstrip his wildest dreams... or nightmares. How far would you go to be with the one you love? **COMPLETE**
1. Hitori

Longest Hour-1 _Note on chapter titles: 'Hitori' means 'one person;' it can also mean 'one alone.' As for the second chapter, 'Futari' means 'two people' and also has connotations of the phrase 'a pair' or 'two together.'_

  


**The Longest Hour   
By Ysabet**   
  
  


Chapter One: Hitori

Breakfast was a mystery, so far as Edogawa Conan could tell. 

He would take his place at the table beside Mouri-san, hopeful and expectant; esoteric clatterings and mysterious whirring noises would emit from the kitchen, and eventually mouth-watering scents would waft into the dining room as a preamble to the wonderful things Ran brought out so matter-of-factly to present to her eagerly-awaiting supplicants. 

Weird; _every_ time either Conan or Ran's father attempted to use the kitchen, all they would produce would be a possibly-lethal, messy, unrecognizable disaster. As he watched the dishes being placed in all their glory on the table cloth, the boy silently thanked God for microwave-popcorn-packets and instant Ramen; the two males of the household would have surely starved during Ran's occasional absence otherwise. 

But right now..... eagerly he began to make inroads on his breakfast. One of the few good things about being an erstwhile seven-year-old, he had found, was the fact that he could tuck away *enormous* amounts of food without feeling at all ill; his child's body burned up the calories like so much paper. Maybe it wasn't much of a consolation, but it was _something._

Seven-year-old? No, today was..... Well, it was his 'birthday' of sorts, wasn't it? The day Kudo Shinichi had passed out of the world and Edogawa Conan had first seen the light of day--- or, more specifically, the light of a policeman's flashlight, shining in his startled eyes. His birthday. He was 'eight' now. Yeah, right..... _*Happy Birthday to me*_ he thought bitterly, a bite sticking in his throat. 

A year ago today..... He glanced up; the table was unusually silent this morning. 

Mouri Kogoro was shoveling his breakfast into his mouth stolidly, frowning at the newspaper as usual; his black brows were clenched as he worked his way through the local crime section and into the obituaries, looking for a juicy murder or baffling theft. Conan sighed; every morning it was the same.... his 'host' would grumble and grouch across the pages while munching Ran's cooking without a single word of thanks; Ran would eat quietly and talk with her young friend..... oh. She wasn't saying a word.... 

No; she was looking down at her plate, picking at the food as if looking for omens in the crumbs. Her dark head was bent, one chestnut-brown lock of hair falling softly forward to lie across her cheek. Ran was silent this morning; and Conan knew why. 

Or rather, _Shinichi_ did. 

A year. 

The boy swallowed hard, remembering; he had made a promise the night before, actually written it out plainly on paper..... When Ran had woken up in the early morning, she had been greeted by a gift, spilling over her windowsill and into the room: flowers, stolen from the neighboring gardens. Flowers that had been carefully delivered in secret by hands that loved her no less despite the fact that they were _smaller_ now than before; hands that had tucked a note into a particular knot of blossoms. And the note had been a promise, and the promise was waiting to be kept, and the keeping would be a difficult thing. 

_'Dear Ran, I couldn't be here for you the way I wanted to be--- so these flowers have to be here in my place. There's so much I want to tell you, and I promise you'll understand everything by the end of the day. It's going to be so very hard to explain, but please, Ran, wait for me--- I won't leave you ever again. I promise.'_

A year was a long time to wait for _anybody._ Too long--- and _he_ had been waiting too--- 

"Conan-kun?" _*Huh? What?!?*_ Startled, he pushed his glasses up on his nose in a reflexive gesture. 

Ran was smiling across the table at him, her sharp, dark eyes catching the morning sunlight coming in through the window and throwing it back at him. "Today's your birthday; what would you like to do? We could go to the park, or go downtown to the arcades, or to the bookstores---" she knew his tastes; "--- what would you like to do? I told you'd I'd go anywhere with you today....." 

Well, this was it; this was the moment when he could either chicken out, like a little kid--- or try and act like the young man he had once been. He smiled back at her, the slightly ironic expression sitting a little oddly on his young face. "Let's--- go to the amusement park, Ran-neechan, to Tropical Land; that'll be... fun." He tried to feed a note of enthusiasm into his voice, tried to act the child for her; it must've worked at least a little bit, for she smiled at him and reached across the table to tousle his dark hair with one playful hand. 

"I'm glad you picked that, Conan; I called your friends last night and told them we'd be going somewhere for your birthday, so they should be arriving any time now." He stared at her in dismay. _*Oh God, like this isn't going to be hard enough as it IS---*_ The gentle amusement in her face faltered at his reaction. "Don't you want them to come along, Conan-kun?" 

He forced a smile from somewhere. "Oh, sure; I just didn't expect--- you said they should be here soon? I'll go meet them!" And he hopped down from his chair, scuffing around the corner to scoop up his tennis shoes as he clattered down the few steps into the foyer. Behind him, he could hear Mouri-san grunt and turn another page of the morning paper. 

Ran stared after him; he was acting..... odd this morning. Well, it was his birthday; he was entitled. Eight was an important age for a little boy, and *this* little boy was..... exceptional enough as it was. 

Sometimes she wondered just *how* 'exceptional' he was. And just how much of a little boy he was, too. But that was stupid; she knew that, knew her wild speculations regarding Conan were just that: wild speculations, nothing more. It was just her imagination that made her watch his gestures, listen to his inflections, watch those eyes behind the lenses.... and think about Shinichi..... 

Just her imagination. 

She shook her head as if trying to dislodge the disturbing thoughts from her mind. Across the table her father grunted once more as he folded the newspaper up, chasing a last bite across his plate. "So you're going to take the kid out for the day, hm? Well, don't go overboard..... but here; have yourself a good time too. You've been looking a little ragged lately---" 

Startled, Ran looked up; it wasn't like her father to really pay _attention_ to that sort of thing; and now he was eyeing her with a certain amount of concern in his black eyes as he slid a folded wad of currency across the table to her. Slowly she picked the money up. "Um, thanks--- that'll help a lot. But I'm okay, really. It's just been a long week and all, and---" She broke off at the sound of the door opening down below, and smiled in spite of herself at the burst of three-part childish chatter that exploded in, accompanied by three stampeding young bodies. Conan's calm voice sounded over them all, trying to corral their energy in the manner of a much older person. 

Ran shook her head again, laughing at herself. She slid out of her chair, picking up the plates and placing them in the sink. "I'd better get everyone going or we'll miss our bus." She bent to kiss her father on one cheek; he snorted briefly, but his eyes softened as he watched his daughter gather her purse and shoes. "Don't be too late coming back--- and don't let those brats wear you out!" 

Pushing her hair back from her eyes, Ran shrugged; "It won't be that bad--- Genta's father Kojima-san will be picking them all up at the park gate at three p.m., so they won't really be with me all day. And it is Conan's birthday--- I want him to have a good time!" 

Her father just snorted again, drinking the last of his coffee. "You spend too much time on that boy. It's not like he's even _ours..."_

His daughter laughed, lowering her voice a little. "Well, can you imagine Dr. Agasa taking him to the amusement park for his birthday? I mean, no chance..... and that's the only relative he has near him right now; poor kid." Her words trailed off as she started down the stairs to the impatiently-waiting group below. Ran glanced down; as usual, Conan's three schoolmates were talking non-stop, trying to draw him into their conversations. He was taking it all in his usual fashion, unusually calmly for such a young boy. You'd think he was older, the way he reacted..... 

_*Stop that. You're just..... He's just a bit more grown up than they are, that's all. Remember: It's just your imagination.*_ Turning back for a moment with her hand on the stair railing, she called: "Will you be here today, or are you going into town?" 

Her father sat his cup down on the table with a clink of china and stood up, checking his watch. "No--- don't you remember?" He ran an impatient hand over his hair, smoothing it into place. "I've got to meet your mother today for lunch, and then we're going out to look at that car she's thinking about buying." He looked sour. "...Can't imagine _what_ she'd want with a car....." he grumbled, shaking his head. 

Ran hid a smile as she ducked her head, shuffling on her shoes in the foyer entrance. The "car" incident was probably another of her mother's attempts to see how her husband was doing..... it happened now and then. "So--- you won't be home until late?" She could always _hope_ they were beginning to reconcile; their meetings seemed to be a little more frequent lately. 

Mouri Kogoro shrugged. "Who knows? Not me, that's certain..... your mother is one mystery I'll never be able to solve." But the tips of his moustache quirked up a little and a certain smugness crossed his face. As she shepherded her charges out the door, it occurred to Ran that her father wasn't _completely_ oblivious, after all..... 

********************************************* 

"Conan-kun, Conan-kun, will you ride the Saucer Ride with me?" Ayumi bounced in her seat on the bus, eyes sparkling. On either side of her Genta and Mitsuhiko looked daggers at the other boy, who sighed. 

"I guess so.... but let's all ride, okay? There's room for all of us on one saucer." _*There; that ought to help. Tell me, God, is it really necessary for you to inflict me with a little girl's crush? Is it that funny? I mean, she's a **kid**--- if I took her seriously, I'd feel like a child molester or something.*_ Conan caught Ayumi's slightly disappointed pout, but he also saw the relieved (if puzzled) looks on the other two boys' faces. _*And I've got rivals, too. Hooray. Sure hope You're getting a big laugh out of this, 'cause I'm damn well not...*_

The bus rumbled on towards its destination. 

********************************************* 

Three seats back, two figures were watching the small group intently. The larger figure turned increasingly worried eyes down to the smaller and whispered "Ai--- are you _sure_ this is a good idea?? You said it was an emergency....." 

The smaller figure glared up at him. "Keep your voice down--- do you want them to know we're here? And it _is_ an emergency." Narrow-eyed, the small blonde girl slouched low in her seat, tucking her chin down as her hands played idly with the package in her lap. "You _know_ what today is--- you know what happened a year ago. I'm quite sure that Shinichi is planning something... dramatic; it's his style." Her sharp eyes gleamed as she looked up at Dr. Agasa. "He's probably going to tell his girlfriend the truth, don't you think? Unless I miss my guess--- and I doubt that I have--- he's decided to make a big presentation of the whole thing." Now she sighed, running her small fingers through her hair in an unmistakably adult fashion. "How very _romantic."_ Her tone dripped sarcasm. 

The older man beside her grunted, shifting his portly form a little closer to the window. Sometimes he couldn't quite _like_ this unchildlike child beside him, despite her undoubted scientific genius; her tendancies towards amorality made him uncomfortable. He frowned down at her. "Isn't that his right? If he wants to tell her, well--- that's _his_ business, isn't it?" 

The girl shrugged. "Certainly it is. I simply want to make certain that... things... go as they should." She smiled slightly to herself. "I have a stake in this too, after all; the more people know our secret, the more chances exist of disclosure." Her hand slid into the pocket on her rather baggy jacket, fingering two items there: one was large, heavy and cold, the other small and lightweight. "And..... I rather respect the Mouri girl, actually; she has a brain and a certain amount of courage. Shouldn't I do all that I can to make sure that everything works out the best for them both?" The smile that she gave to the doctor was probably intended to be an innocent one. 

His eyes darkened. "Just what are you planning, Ai?" He huffed his breath out in a snort. "I should call out to them right now and let them know we're here---" The girl placed a placating hand on his arm. "Calm down; I promise you, I won't do them any harm whatsoever. Truely, I only mean them well; after all, if something happened to Shinichi I'd be out my greatest defense, correct? He's like a weathercock; I always know if there's trouble sniffing around, because _he_ knows it first." She chuckled. "It's in my best interests to keep him healthy--- AND happy." 

Somewhat mollified, the older man sat back. "Hrrrm. I suppose so....." He poked a beefy finger at the package lying in his companion's lap; it gave back the rustle of cloth inside its wrappings. "What's that?" 

The small blonde head bent over the package, smoothing the wrappings again with her delicate fingers. "A present for Ran..... just something I thought she might need later. I'll give it to her at the amusement park tonight." A certain sparkle gleamed in Ai's eyes for a moment. "In fact, I have _several_ presents for Mouri-chan tonight. And, do you know, I think she'll like them all..... eventually." 

She beamed up at the older man. They might have been any uncle and niece, riding on the bus through town together. 

********************************************* 

_*God, who designed these seats, Torquemada? Whoever it was sure didn't have little kids' butts in mind.*_ Conan shifted in place, trying for a more comfortable position. Across from him his three young friends were laying bets as to who could ride the most rides without being the first one to throw up. _*Oh joy; better make sure I sit in the front, then..... less of a splash-factor there.*_

Beside him Ran stretched, leaning back against the hard cushion behind her. She was turned slightly away from him, looking out the window; the boy swung his feet a little, watching her expression carefully. He could see that her profile was pensive, withdrawn; Ran's dark eyes were silent and thoughtful, not really seeing the streets and vehicles outside so much as something visible only in her mind. 

What was she thinking of? Was she thinking about what day it was? About him? About time? He watched her furtively while his friends chattered about anything and everything around them. 

Time..... It would take an hour or so to get to the amusement park; Conan felt trapped. He was going to have to figure out a way to explain things to Ran damned fast..... He had an hour. But he had been thinking about it for a while anyway, hadn't he? Why was it _so_ damned hard to come up with a good way to explain this? He was supposed to be intelligent, right? So why did his brain automatically start swimming in little circles whenever he thought about telling Ran the truth---? 

Time to think about that truth, and how to tell it. He had an hour. 

********************************************* 

_The longest hour in the world is the one you spend deciding how to tell the person you love a secret that will change their life--- and, quite possibly, destroy yours._

********************************************* 

Rides had been ridden, treats had been consumed, and Ran had been driven half-mad herding her charges through the amusement park in some semblance of order throughout the long day. But three o'clock had come and gone, and the children were even now waving goodbye to their friend and his guardian as they climbed into Genta's father's car. 

At the last moment, Ayumi darted back towards where the two stood, stepping up to press a kiss onto Conan's cheek. "Happy Birthday, Conan-kun!" said the girl, beaming at him with a giggle. Astonished, Conan stared at her; then smiled wryly and said "Uh, thanks, Ayumi-kun--- " and he blushed, touching his reddening cheek with his fingers. 

Ran chuckled at his discomfiture; kids were so cute at that age. 

The other two boys were staring at Ayumi with huge, wounded eyes; as the car began to drive away, their stares switched over to Conan--- and the looks they gave him were anything but 'wounded.' He sighed, tugging his glasses off and rubbing at the bridge of his nose. "I'll pay for *THAT* at school tomorrow....." His voice was weary and slightly disgusted. 

Ran frowned, hitching her purse up on one shoulder. That tone was *odd*..... In fact, the boy had sounded strange throughout the entire day. Distracted and a little aloof, he had been rather quiet even while riding the rides--- much quieter than a young boy should be on a birthday outing with his friends. And several times she had caught him sitting silently, staring at her with those huge, knowing eyes, those eyes that saw so much and hid even more..... 

..... She was imagining things again. It had been like this all year, the same routine, played over and over and over again like a broken record. Step One: Conan-kun does something... unchildlike. Step Two: Stupid Ran looks at him and suspects ridiculous things involving Shinichi--- Step Three: Clever and Practical Ran suppresses ridiculous ideas, because they obviously can't be true..... hadn't Shinichi said it? 'There's only one truth.' So..... just because some really stupid, stupid part of her kept shouting that there was _something there,_ that didn't mean that it was really true, did it? Step Four: Strong, Clever, Practical Ran shoves the idiot part of her that comes up with stupid, stupid ideas down into its proper place at the back of her heart----- 

_*Just your imagination, Ran you idiot..... there's only one truth. A child is a child, a man is a man, and no matter what your heart says, your head knows better that things like that just.... don't happen. Shinichi isn't here--- but where IS he, anyway? He said he'd explain 'everything' to me by the end of the day, and it's getting late and we haven't even seen him-----*_

She watched the boy as the car pulled from the parking lot and was lost in traffic. The late afternoon sun reflected off his glasses as he folded them and began to tuck them into his jacket pocket. Stopping, he shot Ran a guilty glance, then pulled out his glasses case from the same pocket and slipped them inside. The young woman smiled smugly; he was _finally_ taking care of them properly--- it had taken her ages to coach him in that. You'd almost think he had never worn glasses before this..... 

"Conan-kun? Don't you need your glasses?" Ran asked; a flashing glance from those unchildish eyes made a strange quiver run down her spine. He smiled faintly up at her. 

"No; not now. I don't need to wear them with _you_ anymore." With that cryptic answer, the boy turned away to stare towards the one ride they had not yet gone on: the Mystery Coaster. Shoving his hands in his pockets, he glanced at the sky. "A little early, but I guess it's okay...." she heard him mutter. 

"A little early for what?" She quirked one eyebrow quizzically. Shooting her a slightly embarrassed look, Conan turned back to look at the ride again. "Nothing important, not really..... it's just that last year I rode that ride right around sunset; I kinda wanted to do the same thing this year, but..... Let's just go ride it, okay?" And he glanced over his shoulder at her, his eyes smiling. 

The line was unusually short; it seemed no time at all before they were being buckled into their places on the Mystery Coaster. The attendant grinned down at the boy as he snapped the last restraint in place. "Aren't you a little young for this ride, kid?" Conan merely rolled his eyes and looked disgusted. Ran laughed; "Actually today's his birthday..... he's old enough, right, Conan-kun?" 

The boy raised his eyebrows. "Yeah....." he drawled; "I'm all of eighteen..... I sure look it, right?" The attendant broke up at that. "Well, Mister-Young-For-His-Age, you take good care of your girlfriend then, okay?" Still chuckling, he stepped back up onto the platform and released the ride; it shuddered into motion as Conan gripped the handrails, muttering "If you only knew, wiseass....." Before Ran could sputter out a comment regarding his choice of words, they were in motion and it was too noisy to speak, much less hear. 

RUMBLE-RUMBLE-RUMBLE-CRANK-CRANK---CRANK----CRANK-----CRANK--------_CRANK_---------------- They reached the top of the first hill; without thinking, Ran reached for Conan's hand and gripped it tightly in her own. For a moment, her mind flashed back to a moment when she had held another hand in this place, on this day, a year past..... The other hand gripped hers...... 

----------CRANK----------CRANK-CRANK-CRANK-_ROOOOOOAAAAARRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!_ And they were speeding down the hill, a scream or shout of exultation and terror rising from each passenger's throat! Ran felt her hair flying behind her like the tail of a comet as they rushed into a dark tunnel; phantasmic faces seemed to leap out at them from the sides, and she shrieked and leaned closer into the comforting warmth beside her, clutching the hand even tighter..... 

..... the hand which, for a single timeless moment seemed to be _larger,_ large enough to enfold hers, to lace warm, strong fingers between hers and hold them tight..... His eyes flashed at her in the strobing darkness of the tunnel, shoulder-level, no, they were level with hers, no, shoulder-level, no, they were..... 

.....and they were out, blinking in the sunlight and the rush of wind as the coaster swept forward in wild, wind-burning flight towards the next hill. Ran stared down at the boy beside her, who looked up with laughter and excitement sparkling in his eyes. He gripped her hand tighter, small fingers laced in hers---- and then they were reaching the summit again, and there was no more time for thought as the ride rushed on and on and on. 

********************************************* 

Ran was still edgy with adrenalin as they walked away, shaky-legged, from the Mystery Coaster; beside her Conan seemed to have gained some sort of second wind--- he was all but bouncing with energy, tugging her towards a concession stand. "Ran-neechan, let's get something to drink, okay?" Out of habit he had slipped his glasses back on, and the lenses reflected the late-afternoon sunlight back like mirrors. His hand was still gripped in hers, and when he smiled up at the young woman she realized that for some reason he was suddenly looking happier than he had all day. She blinked; did he really like rollercoasters _that_ much? Maybe they should ride it again..... She paid the vendor for their sodas and then paused to take a look around, brushing her wind-disheveled hair back from her face. 

"Well, Conan-kun? What's next?" The light in the sky was beginning to fade a little as the sun sank towards the west. Ran felt her heart sinking with it; _where was Shinichi?_ The day was almost over, and he had _promised_ to meet with her by the end of the day and explain 'everything,' whatever that 'everything' was..... 

She felt a tug on her hand and looked down. "You're thinking about Shinichi, aren't you?" said the boy softly. 

"Ummmm.... how did you know?" The young woman felt her cheeks heat a little. Conan's eyes dropped, and he studied his soda with great intensity, stirring the crushed ice with his straw. "You looked..... sad. You've been looking for him all day, haven't you?" And now he drew a deep breath, seemingly steeling himself towards something; he linked his hand in hers again, and Ran could feel his fingers tighten. "Let's walk..... there's a place I want to show you, and something I need to tell you, too." 

Her eyebrows drew down; "What?..... Conan-kun, is--- is Shinichi there? He said he'd meet me----" 

The boy smiled up at her, a lopsided smile. "Sort of. You'll see..... Just come with me." And pulling her firmly after him, he led her between two buildings towards the back lot of the park. As they walked, Ran craned her head up; she could see the lights of the rollercoaster beyond a thick stand of trees..... they were in a rather derelict-looking area now, a clearing between the back of the arcade and some deserted-looking outbuildings, somewhat overgrown with shrubbery and a small copse of trees. Empty crates and old lumber leaned against a wall. "Conan-kun? Where are we going?" 

The boy studied the clearing carefully; his eyes fixed on a spot between two bushes, up against a wall across the way. "Right there--- it happened _right there....."_ he muttered, tension making his small shoulders rigid. Then he seemed to relax slightly, and he tugged his companion over to a bench at the back of the arcade. "This will be okay, I guess." Slowly Ran sat down, her eyes confused. "Conan--- there's nothing here..... wait, is Shinichi going to meet us here?" Her eyes lighting up, she looked in all directions, a smile beginning to find its way onto her face. "This is _just_ the kind of place he'd want to meet in..... all spooky and deserted." She laughed, a lovely sound, and shook her head. "Shinichi, you mystery-loving idiot..... do you _ever_ stop trying to be mysterious?" 

********************************************* 

Conan felt a ripple of terror quiver through the excitement that had gripped him since the coaster ride. Something about the rush and wildness of the Mystery Coaster had firmed his resolve, given him a strength to see this through. Maybe it was just that he had finally, _finally_ come full-circle, back to the place where Shinichi had ended and Conan had began..... It was as if something had snapped into place; the pattern was complete now, the circle was closed, and they could both move on. He was still absolutely terrified of how Ran would react--- but somehow he wasn't afraid of telling her the truth, not anymore. There was a certain inevitability to the whole thing; it was time. 

Still looking around for his past self, Ran turned her head back to look at him; God, she looked so pretty in the dim light, her dark hair a little tangled and her cheeks flushed..... "Conan? What's the matter? You said you had something to tell me..... What is it, Conan-kun?" 

_*Okay--- here goes..... God, You owe me one--- help me make this work!*_ Conan slowly took off his glasses, folding them and slipping them into his pocket again. When he looked up, it was no longer a child that fixed his piercing eyes on the young woman. 

"Not Conan, Ran..... _not Conan._ Never Conan again, not to you. I'm Shinichi, Ran..... I know it sounds crazy, but----- I'm _Shinichi."_ His eyes never left hers. 

She faltered under his gaze, stumbling a little on her words. "W-what? Conan-kun, what're you---" He cut her off with a curt, unchildlike gesture. _"**Not**_ Conan--- Ran, please..... listen. I said I'd tell you everything today and I meant it. Just listen, please **listen** to me--- I ---" Abruptly he ran out of breath; with a gasp, he continued, the words tumbling over each other in their rush to finally come out. "Last night I climbed up to your window and I left you those flowers and the note--- I knew you'd remember where to look, and you did, didn't you?--- and I promised I'd tell you everything, and if you'll just let me _explain_ I will, but Ran, you've got to believe me, I never meant to keep this secret from you, but if word got out that I was like this and _still alive_ you'd be in trouble too, and I----- I didn't want you to be hurt-----" 

Now she held up a hand, stopping the flow of desperate words. Ran leaned back on the bench, perplexed; as she stared at the boy in front of her, _the boy whose eyes held *nothing* of a child in them,_ she began to shiver. 

And, after all the long months of denial to finally, *finally* allow herself to _think....._

.....and, at last, to _**believe..... **_

".........................Shinichi.....?" 

*It--- IS him. Oh dear God.....* 

At the stricken look on her face, Conan/Shinichi reached forward to brush light fingers against her cheek. "Ran--- it's okay, it's really me--- Ran? _Ran??"_ She had flinched from his touch as if scalded. Appalled, he drew back; but before he could pull too far away she had caught his small hand in her larger one, as she had held it so many times while walking, while playing, while helping him with something too large for his small frame to handle..... so many times over the past year..... 

Her face was white. "---How--- Shinichi, it _**IS**_ you, isn't it? I--- " Ran couldn't seem to catch her breath; it felt as though some great pit had opened up beneath her feet. "There's been moments that I've thought--- I..... I've wondered, so many times..... I kept looking at, at C-_Conan,_ and seeing _you-----"_ Ran's eyes were huge; they dropped down to where she held his hand, and her fingers traced the shape of his as it lay in hers. Slowly she dropped it and brought her own hands up to her face, covering her eyes as if to blot out the truth that she had suspected, had somehow _known_ in her heart of hearts for the greater part of an entire year. 

"..... this is _insane....."_ Her voice quivered, splintering like broken glass. A cold wind seemed to breath outwards from her words. 

Silence. They remained that way for a timeless moment, frozen within the second as if trapped in amber. At last Conan, no, _Shinichi_ moved, slipping past the girl to sit beside her on the bench. He began to speak very quietly, looking out across the small grove of trees. 

"I never intended to keep this a secret for this long..... I never really thought it'd _last_ this long--- being a kid, I mean." He laughed a little wryly. "I thought--- I guess I thought I'd either find a way back to normal by now, or maybe... maybe that the damned drug would've killed me by now." Shinichi ducked his head, staring at the rough grass below the bench.. "I couldn't tell you, Ran, I _couldn't-----_ and I wanted to so _badly---"_ His soft, childish voice cracked on the final word. 

At last she looked up. _*White as a ghost*_ thought the boy; he had always thought that was just a turn of phrase. When she spoke, her voice was remarkably steady. "Sh-- Shinichi? What 'drug'? And _WHY_ couldn't you tell me?!? _WHY?!?"_ There was an underlying trace of anger behind her words, far down but strong, like the deepest current in a stream. 

Now it was his turn to close his eyes briefly, a look of pain passing across his young face like a shadow. Taking a deep breath, he began: "Okay..... You remember that day a year ago, when we saw that murder on the Mystery Coaster? And afterwards, you remember I decided to follow those guys in the black outfits? Well--- that was the worst decision I _**ever**_ made, believe me....." 

********************************************* 

_And, haltingly, he talked; and slowly he explained; and he told her..... everything. And she listened, while the minutes passed and time ticked by for them both as the day shaded towards a blood-red sunset._

********************************************* 

After the words ran out, Conan sat silently beside Ran on the bench. The shadows were beginning to gather with the onset of evening, and the distant roar of the amusement park behind them sounded oddly detached, not part of the cold, quiet reality that the two of them were sharing at all. 

At last the young woman stirred; her eyes were still wide with shock, and with something else: pain. "You've been here with me all the time....." she said softly; "...all the time; you've been right here--- _and you never told me."_

Shinichi closed his eyes. "Ran--- if it got out, if the Black Organization found out I was still alive--- you'd be _toast._ You'd be the first on their target list; then your dad would die--- maybe your mom, and then Dr. Agasa, and then probably Genta and Mitsuhiko and Ayumi--- I just _couldn't take the chance!_ Don't you think I _wanted_ to tell you?!?" He laughed, a small bitter laugh. "I used to dream about it--- We'd go someplace for lunch, or we'd be at school or something, and I'd tell you about everything that had happened and then--- well, these were dreams--- suddenly I'd be back to my normal self, as if telling you the truth had been a magic charm to make me what I used to be." The boy shook his head, hard. "But there's no magic that's going to make me what I was; just hard science, if Ai manages to find a cure....." 

Ran's voice matched her eyes; it trembled somewhere between fury and grief. "But, but Shinichi--- didn't you _trust_ me?!? I wouldn't betray you--- you knew that---" 

"Ran--- of _course_ I trusted you--- _it was me I didn't trust!_ If I slipped just **once**, you'd _die,_ and your dad and Agasa and the kids..... All I could do was wait..... and wait, and wait; and hope---" his voice broke--- "that _you_ would wait for me, _too."_

He drew a deep, hard breath. "I've been with you, just like you said..... waiting; waiting for time to take me back to myself, waiting to come home to you the way--- the way I was. And it hasn't been _all_ bad---" He laughed, the ironic note of his laughter sounding strange in a child's voice. "I've learned some humility, if nothing else. And I've learned patience..... well, a little, maybe. But---" and he turned to her, his eyes intense. 

"BUT WHAT?!?" she cried out, her anger beginning to turn to tears. Ran pressed her palms against her burning eyes. "What can you tell me that'll make this any _better?_ I mean--- Sh-Shinichi--- " She stood up, spinning around and spreading her arms wide--- "How can we go back to normal life now?? How--- how can I see you every day and just act the same, knowing it's _you_ there behind Conan's face?" She stopped abruptly; her shoulders slumped. Turning away, she walked a few steps out into the clearing, staring unseeingly at the trees and bushes. "I've picked you up..... carried you in my arms; I've held your hand when we crossed the street--- I've treated you like a child..... like the child I thought you _were!_ And now I'm just supposed to go back to that? When I _know_ who you really are?!?" 

The tears glinted on her cheeks in the lights from the arcade; Shinichi stood helpless. He wanted to go to her, hold her----- but if he did, it would be a child's arms she was held in, not the ones that she wanted. "Ran--- Ran, I don't know what to tell you----- you deserved the truth, after waiting so long---" 

She whirled to face him. "Waiting? Yes, Shinichi--- I've been waiting. Waiting for you to come back to me--- and now, now you may _never_ come back. We may be ten years out of step with one another for the rest of our lives----- and perhaps if we, if we were both o-older, we could manage. But I've known you since we were children---" and her voice stumbled on the word. She was silent for a moment; then she looked up, and her eyes were clear and desperate. "Shinichi, I can't wait for you to come to me any longer..... I don't know what we can do, but we've got to do something. _Tonight has to be the end of the waiting."_

He stood frozen; if a heart breaking made a sound, he thought despairingly, surely the whole world heard his then. "You... don't love me now, do you? You can't....." 

At that she stepped forward, eyes kindling. "Don't be stupid--- of _course_ I love you! Would I even be here now, talking to you, if I _didn't?_ It's just--- it's time for the waiting to end. A year----- a _year-----"_ Ran paused, breathing hard; her face still glinted silver in the dim light, wet with tears. She stepped away from him then, moving towards the old lumber stacked against one wall; without the slightest change of expression she drew back: ***CRACK!!!*** A board fell to the ground in two split pieces, and Shinichi recalled in that moment that Ran was still accounted as the Karate champion of his old school. 

Still facing the boards, she spoke; her words were soft, barely audible of the distant roar of the arcade. "I love you as much as I ever did, Shinichi. I--- suppose I'm stupid that way. Stupid enough to love somebody who's trapped in the body of a little kid. Stupid enough to know that---- that I'm stuck l-loving you, no matter what, but _Shinichi..... the waiting has to stop..._ somehow....." Dashing one arm across her eyes, she turned away, stumbling back towards the main park. 

Relieved and yet heartsick, he reached out for her. _"Ran---?"_

She shook her head. "Just let me go..... I need to think. We've got to do something, there's got to be something that hasn't been tried." Ran attempted a smile, a wan, pale imitation of her usual expression. "I'm not abandoning you, Shinichi; I'm way too stubborn for that--- you know I am. But..... I've got to think." And she paused; "Will you be--- alright, if I go off for a bit on my own? I just... I just need to _think."_

He looked down at his toes, fidgeting with the drink he still held in his hands. "Sure..... You--- you'll come back, won't you? I'll wait for you....." 

Briefly she nodded, brushing at her eyes. And then she looked at him, really *looked* at him, and smiled a little again. "You know, I can't understand how I didn't see it before..... I guess I just didn't _let_ myself see. But..... you're _you._ You're Conan, but you're..... _**you**."_ And quickly she turned and walked away, back towards the lights of the amusement park. 

**********************************************************************************************************************************   


**End of Chapter 1**


	2. Futari

Longest Hour-2   


**The Longest Hour   
By Ysabet**   
  
  


_Chapter Two: Futari_

A small figure sat to one side of a busy crossing in Tropical Land, her tousled blonde hair drifting slightly in the evening breeze. A passerby might have wondered what such a young girl (no more than seven or eight, surely) was doing all alone, sitting so composedly on her bench. Perhaps she was waiting for someone? 

That's exactly what Haibara Ai, formerly Mayano Shiho, was doing: waiting. Huddling a little closer into her jacket, she sipped at her soda and smiled a secure, secret smile. 

_*Poor Shinichi; so predictable----- I even figured out where he was going to break the news to his girlfriend. Such a dramatic gesture!*_ She chuckled to herself. _*I'm sure he considers himself a terribly practical person, totally above sentimentality and all that drivel..... poor boy; poor little boy. So predictable.* _

*Doubless that's one of the reasons I like him as much as I do.* 

It had taken little imagination to interpret the conversation that she had watched from a distance, unseen among the bushes behind the arcade; the Mouri girl had looked so stricken..... truthfully, though she had actually handled it rather well; her observer had admired the control with which Ran had taken out her tension and stress on the old boards rather than on Shinichi's small body..... Ai kept her head down as the object of her speculation passed in front of her; right on time, there was Mouri-chan. The small girl/woman sat her drink to one side and bent low, fumbling with the laces of one shoe as if to retie the bow. From her vantage point she could see Ran (moving a bit jerkily, perhaps?) heading towards the brightest lights of the park. _*No Shinichi beside her? Ah, well; I expected as much. She'll want time to think things over, no doubt. An excellent opportunity for a little chat between friends.....*_ Straightening, Ai slipped off the bench after her quarry. 

********************************************* 

_*Walk, Ran; just keep walking. Walk and walk and walk and walk and-----*_

She had always felt better while in motion; action was an aid to clarity, smoothing emotions like the gentle, insistant rush of water over jagged stone. And tonight--- tonight she needed that clarity, if ever. For all her protestations to Shinichi, she had not the least idea of what they could do. 

She had never felt so helpless in her life. 

All around Ran the lights of the amusement park moved in complicated patterns..... everywhere people were going about their lives, happy or sad or restless or calm or----- In God's name, didn't they _know_ how chaotic everything could become in a second?!? Her world had turned over tonight, top to bottom; she had finally found Shinichi, only to learn that he had been with her all along..... and she had never allowed herself to see him. 

Perhaps that was the hardest part; he had been there, and her heart had kept telling her and _telling_ her that he was right there--- but no, things like that just _didn't happen,_ now did they? Of course not; that was only logical. 

Well; so much for logic. Things like that _did_ happen, and they had happened to Shinichi. And, therefore, to her. As Ran made her way to a small bench between an ornamental flowerbed and an okonomiyaki vendor, she smiled a little grimly to herself. She hadn't been lying to Shinichi when she had said that she wouldn't abandon him; but what was she going to do now? 

What were _they_ going to do now? 

The morning would come, and she would drop Shinichi.... no, _Conan_ by his school, and she would watch him walk away, just one more small boy among hundreds..... Except that he wasn't, and she knew he wasn't, and she just _didn't think she could bear it....._

Ran's fingers gripped the edge of the bench; wood splintered under her nails, dropping in tiny chips and shreds onto the pavement below. After a moment a sharp pain brought her back to herself--- a shard of wood had lodged itself in one finger-tip. Startled, she carefully pried the tiny splinter out.... then looked around with a sigh. The tiny wound had acted as something of a wake-up call, and the world had at last drifted unnoticed back into focus. 

Just as well; panicking wouldn't get her anywhere. Despite the shock that still rippled coldly through her bones, Ran found herself smiling just the very smallest bit. _*It's funny..... Even though I can't quite imagine how to handle the world after this..... I'm still glad I finally found Shinichi. Stupid Ran--- Idiot Ran. I should go around wearing a badge saying "Mouri Ran Is The World's Greatest Lovesick Fool." But.....*_ She ran shaky hands through her long hair, drawing it close against her face as if to shield herself from the eyes around her. _*...but to hear his voice--- even all little-boy-sounding and all that--- to hear him say my name and say it as Shinichi, not Conan.... well, not entirely as Conan, anyway--- and this time it wasn't through a phone line or from the other side of a door.....* _

*I **am** an idiot. But I'm still glad I found you again, Shinichi.* 

*Even if I **do** feel like you deserve a good thump on the head for this-----* 

The noise of the park was an intrusion on her thoughts; she needed somewhere better to think, somewhere quiet. But where did you find quiet at a place like this? People came here for company, for noise and lights and crowds. Where---? 

Her attention was drawn to a smaller, older looking attraction right across the way, something that she understood to be rather common in America but which wasn't found often in Japan: a house of mirrors. The gaudy, glittering facade seemed to beckon her, and the reflecting panes seen through the wide doorway offered a passage out of the noisy crowd that surrounded Ran on all sides. She found herself moving towards the entrance before her tired brain had conciously made a decision to do so. 

Her ticket paid, Ran slowly walked inside. _*Maybe this wasn't such a good idea..... this is a place you go to become confused; aren't I confused enough already? But at least it's quiet.....*_ The old, slightly worn attraction had few takers tonight apparently; Ran might have been alone in the gleaming, glass-walled passages. For a little while she wandered aimlessly, her thoughts drifting. _*Shinichi..... what has it been like for you, watching the world behind your child's eyes? Did you ever wish that the poison those men fed you had killed you? God, I'm so glad it didn't; no matter what happens, at least we're both still alive. That's something..... But--- how can you come home to me? It's as if we've been climbing a staircase all our lives together, you and I; but Shinichi, you fell down the stairs, back to where we once were..... and I kept on going.....*_

She wandered deeper into the maze of glass; her reflections watched her with shadowed, pitiless eyes--- eyes that knew what Ran knew, eyes that had seen what Ran had seen tonight in the face of a boy named Conan. The maze drew her in, corridor leading to passage leading to switchback leading to another dead end----- 

"Mouri-chan." 

Ran nearly jumped out of her skin; she whirled about. _*Who---?!?*_

A little girl stood before her, golden-haired reflections spreading out around her like the shattered tail of a peacock. The child was smiling, her clear eyes bright and focused on the young woman's face. "Ummm.... I know you, don't I?..... you're---" 

The girl chuckled; there was something oddly _adult_ about the sound. "Oh yes, you know me; you've seen me with Dr. Agasa quite a few times, and at Conan's school..... though you might think of me in a rather different light after tonight, I suppose. Do you remember me now?" She stood at ease, her small hands thrust deeply into her oversized jacket's pockets. 

Ran stared; a name was beginning to rise up in her mind, a name and a memory..... _*He said she made the drug, and she ended up taking it herself.... her name....*_ A rising swell of fury began to mist Ran's vision with red. 

"You're _**Ai**._ Haibara Ai. The woman that made the drug. _You're responsible for what happened to Shinichi."_

The blonde girl frowned. _"Woman?_ Not anymore; I imagine your boyfriend explained to you about that---" Suddenly her words broke off as she noticed the determined way Ran was moving towards her. "Oh, come now, Mouri-chan; what are you going to do? Hurt a defenseless little girl?" Ai backed up a few steps, her hand fumbling with something in her jacket pocket. In a second she whipped out a small snub-nosed gun, black and ugly. As she brought it around to aim it at the furious young woman, she began again in a calm, reasonable voice: "If you try anything, you're likely to regret it---" 

Her words were swept away as Ran's arm moved in a sweeping blow; the gun went flying to skitter harmlessly across the dusty wooden floor. Much to her surprise, Ai found herself suddenly pressed against a wall of glass, two painfully tight hands holding her shoulders in an unbreakable grasp. _"You-- did-- this!!"_ spat Ran, shaking her with each word. _"This-- is-- all-- your-- **fault!!!"**_ Abruptly she let go of the girl's shoulders; Ai staggered sideways, gasping with shock. As she recovered, she looked up..... into the barrel of her own gun. 

_*Stupid, Ai--- underestimating your opponent again. That's always been your greatest fault...*_ thought the girl/woman grimly, swallowing hard. The black opening in the barrel suddenly looked to be at least a foot across from her vantage point. 

Ran held it steady, focusing on the small, pale face in front of her. The young woman's jaw was set, and a look of distinct fear flashed across Ai's eyes for a moment..... Then, her movements deliberate and careful, Ran popped the clip from the weapon and pocketed them both. 

She shook her head, leaning back against the pane behind her. "Did you think I was going to shoot you? Well, maybe I would have... or maybe not; but you damn well won't shoot me tonight. Is that why you're here? _Haven't you done enough to screw up our lives?!?"_

Ai shrank back the smallest bit from the Ran's fury; the young woman's face was as pale as milk and her eyes blazed with anger. The girl held up a hand. "Wait, wait--- I didn't come here to shoot you tonight--- " 

"Oh no, that gun was just a fashion accessory, wasn't it? Just the _thing_ for grade-schoolers to take to the amusement park with them!" snapped Ran; her breath came hard and sharp, fuled by adrenaline. She hadn't actually planned on hurting the girl _(*but there was that moment, wasn't there?*_ asked her conscience; _*that moment when you might have.....*_ And perhaps she had, almost. _*But I didn't.*_ replied Ran to herself; _*I didn't--- quite.*) _

*Not **quite.*** 

Ai shrugged. "I'm not as trusting as Shinichi is, Mouri-chan; the Black Organization turns up at the oddest places. I tend to go armed these days, no matter where I go." Still tense, she watched Ran with narrowed eyes. "As for why I'm here tonight..... well; I can read a calendar as well as anyone, my dear Mouri-chan, and I know perfectly well what day this is. I expected Shinichi to 'tell all' in a suitably dramatic location; he took you to the site of his transformation, did he not?" 

At Ran's sharp intake of breath, the unchildlike child continued on in a calm, rather clinical voice. "I have no illusions regarding how you must feel about me just now; but wouldn't you say that I'm paying for my creation of the drug in a rather... _appropriate_ fashion? Quite ironic, isn't it?" She gestured at her small self. "I took the drug to ensure my own death, rather than accept whatever my old employers planned to dole out to me; witness the result." Ai laughed, a sharp sound; it echoed against the reflections all around her. "What is it that Shakespeare said? 'Be sure your sins will find you out,' eh?" 

Ran shivered. "So.... if you're not here to mess with our lives even more, just why *are* you here? You--- haven't found a cure, have you---?" 

The girl snorted. "Use that mind of yours, Mouri-chan; would I be standing here in the shape of a child if I had? Hardly. No, it's two steps forward and three steps back on that little problem--- I designed an _excellent_ drug." She smirked slightly; then her expression turned grave. 

"No, my dear Mouri-chan, I actually came here tonight to... _help_ you. Or at least--- " and she laughed self-depreciatingly--- "to balance things a little." She sighed and looked to one side, and for the barest moment a strangeness seemed to pass over her small, round face: regret? guilt? Not quite strong enough to be either of those, perhaps, but something near. Then she blinked, and the moment ended; her sharp eyes fixed themselves on Ran's face again. 

"I don't suppose you'd actually believe me, but I feel quite sorry for the two of you, really; two young people with such potential, and with so many chances just waiting for them..... Of course, one might consider the fate that's befallen your Shinichi to be just one of those chances..... But--- and I must tell you, I'd usually consider this sort of thing nothing but romantic stupidity--- I find myself rather disliking the way you two have been separated." She shoved her hands back into her pockets. "I am a scientist, after all--- Shinichi told you about my past, did he not?--- and I profess a certain admiration for symmetry, a thing which your situation now lacks." She chuckled again. 

Ran glared at her small opponent, somewhat unnerved. It was unsettling to hear such adult phrases coming from that calm, innocent countenance. "So just what do you propose to _do_ about it?" 

Ai slipped something out of her pocket and held it out to Ran. "Only _this,_ Mouri-chan." 

It was a package, quite a small one; beautifully wrapped, the tiny box was no more than a couple of inches across. The bow glinted gayly against the bright paper, totally incongruous in the seriousness of the moment. "Well, go ahead; take it--- it won't bite." The girl smiled to herself again, a satisfied, serene smile. "No, it won't bite..... it might do _much_ worse than bite, or perhaps much _better,_ depending on how you feel about the whole situation. Go ahead, Mouri-chan." 

Slowly Ran took the present, holding it as carefully as if it might go off at any second. After a moment's hesitation she pulled the ribbons and paper loose; Ai watched, still smiling. "Somehow it seemed appropriate to wrap my gift to you... like a birthday present, I suppose." The lid came off easily. 

White cotton lay inside, like one might find in a jewelry box; and what lay against the cotton was small and oblong, an elongated oval in shape. 

A single capsule. _*Medicine?....... Oh. **OH.***_

Ran froze. "Well? What do you think of your present, Mouri-chan?" asked the soft, childish voice from in front of her. 

Dumbly the young woman turned her eyes to the face of the child/woman that watched her so intently, arms crossed. Ai's expression was curious, clinical; she indicated the capsule with an inclination of her chin. "I'm sure you realize what you have there. That's a capsule from the original batch of the drug--- I had a few of them still with me when I escaped. Not too many people know _that....._ I'm also quite sure that you understand why I'm giving it to you..... _don't you,_ Mouri-chan?" 

She sighed and regarded the frozen figure before her. "I suppose you'll now begin to try to figure out my motives for giving you such a thing; oddly enough, this once..... my motives are simple. It's as I said: I--- do feel a certain... guilt... regarding your and Shinichi's predicament--- not much, I admit; it's not in my nature to do so. But some, perhaps..... As of this moment, I cannot help either Shinichi or myself back to our old forms; you can be sure that I fully intend to continue looking for a cure, but right now that's rather a moot point, isn't it? You're not interested in what I _plan_ on doing--- your concerns lie in what's happening _now._ And that's why I've given you the capsule." 

Ai pointed at what lay in Ran's palm with a small finger. _"That,_ Mouri-chan, is one of the chances that life has set before _you._ 'Fate,' if you like. Your Shinichi bears a burden; will you walk beside him and watch him carry it, or join him in adversity?" The image seemed to please the small girl/woman; she smiled up at Ran, her eyes sparkling. "It may lighten his load; it may not. What will it do to you, I wonder? Will it make the situation easier to bear or harder? I leave that up to you..... I've done my part tonight. The rest is yours." 

Moving smoothly, Ai stepped up to Ran's still form; small hands slid gently into the young woman's jacket pocket, retrieving the gun and clip and leaving a small slip of paper behind. "I may well need this later; one never knows..... Oh, not against you two; I simply don't like going unarmed these days..... and I plan on going out of town for a month or two now; it seems the pertinent thing to do." She slipped past the dumbfounded young woman and continued on into the maze of glass, her light steps barely sounding against the wooden floor. "Oh--- and Mouri-chan--- the drug works quite swiftly.... the effects take hold within minutes of ingestion. _Don't_ think of taking it in public, will you? If you take it, that is..... And one last thing: Dr. Agasa is at the park tonight too; he should catch up with you two sooner or later. Don't be too hard on the poor man--- he had no part in this at all. Goodnight, Mouri-chan..... and good luck." 

After a moment the pattering steps died away into the distance, lost in a multitude of reflections. It was quite a little while before the young woman moved, blinking hard and slipping the box carefully into her pocket. 

_*Oh, Ran..... Ran, now what will you do?*_

But she knew what she was going to do. _Oh_ yes, she knew. And along with the terror that surged into her at the very thought came a welcome flood of..... hope. 

********************************************* 

_*Well, I did it. I finally did it. And now--- now I guess I've no choice but to wait and see just what I've finally gone and done.*_

Shinichi sat against the wall on the scruffy grass, knees drawn up. It was full dark now, and the lights of the amusement park through colored beams across the clearing before him. His stomach growled at the distant scent of popcorn and vendor's foods that wafted on the faint breeze of evening. _*It's getting sort of late; I wonder when Ran will come back? I wonder if she'll even---- no; no. She'll come back. God only knows what she'll have to say to me, but she'll come back sooner or later.* _

*Shinichi, you idiot--- you didn't even tell her you loved her. Stupid, stupid, **stupid**-----* 

He ran a hand across the rough ground beside him, his eyes dark. Funny how you always thought of these things afterwards, not at a time when they would have done any good; what kind of logic was that? Shinichi tilted his head back, resting it against the wall and looking up at the sky. _*God, if we ever meet, You and I are going to have a talk about how some of the things in this world are done--- I've got some design modifications for You.....*_ He almost smiled. 

The boy swept his hand across the grass again; the blades scratched harshly at his palm. Huh; it didn't look any different than any *other* patch of earth..... but this was where it had happened to him a year ago. On a whim he had sat down in the same spot, as if waiting for something else to happen--- another transformation, maybe a better one. Fingering a strand of tough grass, Shinichi laughed wryly. _*What with my luck, I'd probably turn into a baby. Wouldn't that be Hell? Imagine being yourself, but unable to talk or walk... and then there's the diapers and all that....*_ The boy shuddered. _*I guess I've been lucky. I've had a year more of life than I probably should have had, and Ran didn't freak out too badly when I told her the truth.... Ran..... I should've told you how beautiful you looked; I should've told you so many things.....* _

*I hope you'll let me tell them to you now. I hope..... we can work things out, somehow. Please..... come back to me; I'm waiting for you, Ran.* 

The minutes ticked by, and the boy watched the hazy stars come out above the amusement park. 

********************************************* 

_The longest hour in the world is the one you have to live through while you wait for someone else to decide if you're still worth loving._

******************************************** 

A scuffling sound in the grass made Shinichi look up; Ran---? 

No, not Ran. _*Of all people--- Dr. Agasa?!?*_ And looking very nervous, too. The portly man stumbled through the dark, his eyes as yet unused to the shadows. He cleared his throat, looking from side to side of the clearing worriedly. "Erm. Shinichi? Are you here?" 

The boy sighed. "Right here, Doctor..... no, across from you, by the wall." Agasa lumbered over to him, reaching out a chubby hand as if to help him up. Shinichi shook his head; "It's alright; I'm fine like I am..... Now what in the world are you _doing_ here? I didn't know you liked amusement parks..... and how did you find me?" 

The scientist looked distinctly uncomfortable; he clutched the small package that he held tightly, as if for reassurance. "Ah well, that is---- Ai told me where to find you---" he broke off at the boy's exclamation. "We, erm, followed you to the amusement park today. Ai said it was an emergency..... Shinichi, I'm not _**quite**_ sure what she had in mind, but I think she was planning... _something..."_ He cleared his throat again. "She also said that you intended to tell Ran the truth..... Did you?" 

Shinichi snorted in irritation, running a hand through his hair until it stood on end. _Damn_ the woman! He opened his mouth to answer, but before he could a voice spoke up from the dark behind Dr. Agasa's thick frame: 

"Yes..... he did. He told me everything." 

Ran stood quietly, her silhouete framed by the bright lights of the arcade; her soft chestnut hair drifted around her pale face in the gentle breath of the wind. "He told me, and it's alright..... I understand a lot of things now that I didn't understand before." 

She moved forward towards Shinichi, smiling slightly. Kneeling down in the grass before him, she stared, dark eyes on a level with his. There was so much in those eyes..... an entire galaxy of light and dark seemed to shine from the depths. He saw her swallow briefly; placing the soda she was carrying on the ground beside them, she spoke: "Shinichi..... Was it hard, getting used to a child's body? Or did you remember how it used to be, back when we were kids?" 

He answered her straightforwardly, matter-of-factly. "Well--- I didn't really remember how it was, not physically----- I mean, it felt pretty weird for a long time, and it still does. My mind still remembers how it feels to be tall, to be able to pick up things that I can't handle now, to do the things that this form can't do..... Is that what you want to know, Ran?" He stared back, wondering what she was thinking. 

Slowly she sank down to sit beside him, her back against the wall. Dr. Agasa stood unnoticed, a fascinated witness to their conversation. The young woman blew out her breath in a long, long sigh; her left hand opened, and the crushed fragments of a small cardboard box dropped to the ground. "I guess so..... Shinichi? Did--- did it _*hurt*_ to change?" Still she stared at him, still he stared back; her eyes demanded an answer. 

"Yeah--- it did. It was terrible, and there was no-one here but me.... just me. By the end of it, I thought that I had died." 

Ran dropped her gaze then, and a long shiver seemed to run through her form. "I thought it might hurt..... it was sort of like being born, wasn't it? Birth is supposed to.... hurt...." Again she shivered, harder this time, and her hands tightened on the tufts of dry grass. "Sh-_Shinichi---"_

He turned, hearing her gasp his name. "Ran---? Ran, what's wrong? Are you sick?" Her face was not pale now; it was flushed, and droplets of sweat were gathering on her forehead. _"Ran!_ What's wrong?" Frantic, he reached for her hands. Dr. Agasa moved forward, stooping to place a hand on the young woman's cheek. "She's burning up.... " he muttered, drawing back in helpless alarm. "Ah, Ran-chan, what have you done to yourself, girl?" 

Ran tried to smile, but the first real twinges of agony were beginning to steal across her face as she slumped to the ground. "It, it's okay..... I c-couldn't wait for you to... come home to me any, anymore.... Shinichi... so I---" she paused to gasp in pain; "---I, I'm coming to _you instead----"_

The boy held her hands, his mind racing; hot, she was so _**hot**,_ he could feel the heat pouring off of her skin like smoke. "R-Ran, what are you saying, what....." A cold wind seemed to move through his bones as he stiffened in realization. 

**".....what did Ai _*do*_ to you???"**

Her shivers had stopped; Ran lay utterly limp and still except for her rapid breathing, her face twisted in pain. "C... capsule..... she g-gave it to me..... wanted to be w-with you, Shin... Shinichi.... with you _now....."_

His heart froze within him. _*A capsule..... oh no, no way, NO WAY..... **RAN**!!!*_

As the chemical agony took full hold, Ran managed to choke out one last phrase before she slid into unconciousness: "Sh'nichi..... d'nt leave me...." 

The boy's face was utterly white, stark and terrible to see. "Oh God, Ran, why did you do it?" He remembered seeing her swallow as she knelt down. He stroked her hot cheek. "I'm right here, Ran--- I won't go anywhere, not ever again; I'm right here...." Her skin seemed to tremble under his fingertips, giving off a fine, barely visible mist in the dim light; it wisped up and out from Ran's body, escaping from her clothing in a faint cloud of vapor. She was actually _steaming,_ the alchemy of the change making her alter from the inside out..... "Oh God, oh God, _why did you do this, Ran?!?"_

But she was far beyond answering, her face locked in a rictus of pain. As he held her head in his small lap, Shinichi threw back his head and shouted, hot tears trickling down his cheeks: 

_**"AIIIIIIIIIII!!!"**_

And, no more than twenty feet away, Ai Haibara drew back a little more securely into her hiding spot in the bushes behind the arcade. It was time to leave; she had accomplished what she had set out to do, and perhaps a month or so in the countryside or at the beach would be a good thing just now. Who would notice one more child, walking on the shore? A pity she was unable to witness the transformation firsthand (it would have helped her research no end), but one couldn't have everything. She would just have to ask Agasa all about it later. 

_*I'll need to keep a close eye on dear Mouri-chan; a determined young woman, and one that might prove dangerous if crossed. She would make a very good ally as well, of course..... But now--- now Shinichi will have an even greater reason to keep me safe from the Black Organization, will he not? One more excellent reason to guard me while I search for a cure. Ahhhhh, but symmetry is such a beautiful thing.....*_

Withdrawing with the utmost care and stealth back towards the glow of the main park, Haibara Ai left the others behind with a light heart, smiling catlike and serene. 

********************************************* 

_The longest hour in the world is the one you endure while somebody you love is suffering, when the only thing you can do is..... be there. Not help, not make things better--- just be there. And **watch**._

******************************************** 

In a clinical, scientific way, the process of transformation from natural adulthood to imposed childhood was fascinating. 

An thick blanket of vapor wrapped around Ran's prone form; it steamed from every surface of her body in seemingly-endless clouds, until it was as if the unconcious young woman carried her own atmosphere. The greyish mist had a scent, bitter and harsh; at the first whiff, Dr. Agasa had grasped Shinichi firmly by the shoulder and drawn him back protestingly from the girl. "You don't know what the chemicals in her system will _do_ to you--- your body has already changed; do you want to become even younger? Keep well away, and don't tempt fate!" The scientist had shaken him by the shoulders until he paid attention, but Shinichi would back no further away than a few feet. Dr. Agasa's eyes were fixed on Ran's transformation, storing every aspect and detail that he could make out: the already-baggy clothing (and after no more than thirty minutes or so!), the color and texture of the vapor, the way that the steam-like stuff vanished after it had traveled scarcely a foot or so into the air..... For the first time, the transformation had witnesses. 

Fascinating. 

Horrible. _Horrible._

For Shinichi, it was Hell. He crouched, helpless and frantic, as close as he could without getting within Ran's cloud of vapor. Was that what it had been like for him, he wondered? His hazy recollections of the transformation were nothing more than memories of heat and unbearable pain, darkness, and a waking conviction that he had died in the process. Beyond that--- nothing. Just agony, and the horrific realization that had come to him the first time he saw his own reflection. 

He stared down at his hands. _*So small..... so ridiculously helpless. Dammit! Damn you, Ai--- this is **your** fault, and I won't forget it. What the hell were you **thinking**, giving a capsule to Ran?!? And..... Ran..... oh God, Ran, why did you take it? Now you'll be in the same mess with me, we'll both be in the same boat.....* _

*..... both be in the same boat.....* He choked; something hard and sharp-angled had pushed its way into his throat, fueled by his emotions. It felt like pain, felt like grief, and held in it something of both of those..... but there was more to it than that, surely. Love, too--- and somewhere, unacknowledged and unwelcome--- the tiniest beginnings of gratitude. 

_*How can I be grateful? The woman I love is destroying her life for me! Ran, you idiot, why'd you have to be so goddamned stubborn?!? Couldn't you just forget me, couldn't you just be so mad at me that you were willing to give me up?!? But noooo..... instead you had to go and---- had to go and--- *_ Shinichi pressed his palms against his eyes. 

A hand touched his shoulder gently, and he turned to look up into Dr. Agasa's face. The old man shook his head. "Shinichi, there's nothing either of us can do right now; from what Ai told me in the past, the transformation will take some time..... Why don't you sit back and rest? You'll be of no use to yourself--- or to _her---_ if you can hardly walk. Don't worry--- I'll keep watch." Agasa tugged at him with his hand, and Shinichi allowed himself to lean back against the wall again. 

He drew his knees up, wrapping them with his arms and resting his chin there. _*He's right, but.....*_ The thick envelope of vapor coiled and billowed around Ran's still form; only the faint, rapid sound of her breathing indicated that she still lived. _*Please, Ran, be alright; just be alright. I don't care what shape you end up in--- just be alright.*_ He rubbed at his face. _*Tired, I am so tired; okay then, I'll rest, but just for a few minutes. I won't leave you, Ran; don't worry, I'm right here.*_

His eyes closed. 

Across from him, Dr. Agasa watched the boy's face carefully. The childish features were drawn, wound tight as wire; if a child could look old, this one did right now. Trauma did that to a person. Well, if he could sleep for a little while he'd be the better for it--- and Agasa would, as he had said, keep watch. He glanced at the girl's prone body; was the mist actually _thinning_ just a little? The color had darkened a touch, and her clothes were certainly loose--- he could make out that much through the vapor. Poor, brave young woman. Shinichi had had the change thrust upon him; Ai had transformed by mistake. But _this_ girl had _chosen_ what she had done, in full knowledge of what lay before her. Amazing. 

He darted a look back at the boy; good, his eyes were fully closed and his breathing seemed to be deepening--- Shinichi was asleep. Not surprising in the least. The scientist settled his portly form more comfortably on the rough ground; he would guard them both--- they could count on him. 

_Was_ the vapor cloud actually beginning to thin? It certainly seemed to be..... 

********************************************* 

_It was dark, and Shinichi was looking for something..... for someone. She had to be here, of COURSE she was here--- where else would she be? He just had to keep looking----- _

"Over here--- Hey, Shinichi! Hey, Great Detective! You're looking in the wrong place! Over here, genius---" He turned towards the childish voice. 

Conan stood waving to him, standing on nothing. Well, that's what Shinichi was standing on too--- just air and darkness. He headed purposefully towards his other self, his footfalls silent against the nothingness beneath. "What?!? Did you find her??" 

The boy rolled his eyes in exasperation. "No, stupid; she found us. Don't you remember? She's been looking and looking and LOOKING for us for a whole year---" He crossed his arms and glared up at himself, and then grinned a little as hands slipped over Shinichi's eyes from behind. 

"Guess who?" said a soft voice in the young man's ear; warm breath tickled his skin. He caught one wrist in his hand and turned, to find himself staring eye-to-eye with Ran. 

*God, she's beautiful. Why didn't I ever tell her that?* Even in the darkness of--- wherever--- her eyes sparkled back at him, gleaming with fire and vivid intelligence; her pale face was perfect, all high cheekbones and beautiful smile..... 

And before he had a chance to do anything at all, she pulled him to her and kissed him, **hard**. Shinichi froze, hands out to either side--- he felt like a rabbit trapped in the beams of a car's headlights. Then, as the kiss went on, his hands came up to cradle her face, cupping the line of her jaw..... Her soft lips carressed his, and then slid sideways to press a kiss into his palm; he could feel her smile against the skin. 

..... and then he was pushed backwards, and WHAP! a sharp slap stung his cheek. Dazed, he lifted one hand to his bruised face and heard her steely voice: "Shinichi, so help me, if you EVER keep anything like that from me again, I swear I'll throw you so far NOBODY'll be able to find you when you come down, not even me!" 

He blinked. "Ummmm, keep what from you? What?" His head was ringing. Behind him he could hear what sounded suspiciously like half-muffled childish snickering. 

Ran put her hands on her hips, eyes flashing. "Your SECRET, you idiot! A whole year--- I know, I know, you wanted to keep everybody safe, blah blah blah..... Next time ask for some *help* and don't try to do everything yourself, okay? You always try to take on the world; but sooner or later, the world's going to roll right over you and leave a little *smudge* where you were, and everybody's going to point at it and say 'There's where Kudo Shinichi the Great Detective was standing when he bit off more than he could chew; doesn't he look natural?' Idiot." She snorted in indignation. 

The sounds behind him were no longer muffled; the indignant young man spun in place to glare at Conan, who hugged his sides in agony as he struggled to stop laughing. At his other self's inarticulate snarl, the boy managed to calm down a little; he grinned up at Shinichi. "Sorry, but it was funny..... Damn; sure wish that had happened to me-- the kiss, I mean, not the slap..." 

His older self harrumphed. "Stupid; it DID happen to you." The boy looked perplexed for a moment; then a wide grin spread across his face. "Oh yeah--- I guess it did." He looked up at Ran, his eyes shining. "Ran..... I guess I'd better tell you something, since the Great Genius here doesn't seem to be able to manage it." Shinichi opened his mouth for a moment, then shut it. 

"Tell me what?" She stepped a little closer to them both. 

"Ran..... I love you. That is, WE love you. Ummmm.... do you--- I mean, does this make sense?" The boy's face was hopeful, pleading. 

She considered his words--- their words--- for a moment, and then smiled wryly at them both, her eyes softening. "I guess it does. It's like I said earlier..... you're **you**. It doesn't seem to really matter that there's two of you at the moment." For the first time she looked around, her eyes beginning to register concern. "Where are we, anyway?" 

Shinichi sighed. "Dreaming--- I think. This is where we come to sort things out while we sleep, now and then. Sometimes it's just dark like this; other times we end up at the amusement park. We have no idea if this is real, whatever *that* means, or if we just make it up, or whatever..... Conan goes to sleep, and we both end up here; then Conan wakes up. When we're awake, we're one person; when we're here, we're two." He smiled, and for once the smile had no bitterness in it. "Sorta schizophrenic, huh? But it seems to work okay." 

Then his smile faded, as did Conan's; they both looked at her, sorrow crossing their faces like cloud-shadows over water. Shinichi spoke first: "Ran..... why did you do it? I never wanted you to... to follow me into this. I never intended that, not in a million years. It's not fair to you--- you just gave up the last ten years of your life! Who *knows* if there'll ever be a cure? We might be stuck like this, or we may have to grow up all over again----- and, believe me, it's no picnic being a kid!" 

Conan shook his head; the young/old eyes were dark with sadness. "He's right, you know. It's fun sometimes, but most of the time it's pretty bizzare or humiliating at best. School is a nightmare--- God, it's boring--- and you lose so much: your friends, little things like being able to go someplace without people looking at you funny because you're a kid all by yourself--- and it's *dangerous* too! I'm no stronger than any other seven-or-eight-year-old would be!" The boy looked down at the blackness below them. "You lose so much..... Ran, what did you hope to gain by doing this? What could possibly be worth..... all that?" 

Ran knelt before him, touching her fingertips lightly beneath his chin and making him look up. "You--- you're what I hope to gain by this. You, both of you, ***all*** of you--- Conan and Shinichi." She raised her eyes as the young man approached her and reached out with her free hand to take his. "I don't know what's in store for me, and I'll probably hate parts of it--- but I just couldn't pass this up; it was like--- like catching a subway car. There was that moment when the doors opened, and if I didn't jump on while I could--- if I didn't seize the opportunity--- then the doors would close, and the car would leave without me, and you'd go away. I... just couldn't let that happen again." Her voice was very soft. 

For one long moment the three of them stood there, linked together by touch. Then the moment passed, and Ran stood up, a strange happiness in her eyes as she looked at the two figures beside her. Clearing her throat, she waved a hand airily. "So--- this place is a, a *dream*? But who's doing the dreaming?" 

The boy and the young man looked at each other and then at her; as one, they shrugged. Frowning, Ran crossed her arms. "You're here, I'm here, and I'm pretty sure I'm real--- you're not just dreaming me, you know---" She glanced down at herself. "And I'm an adult still; is there a little 'me' out there somewhere?" She looked around carefully, searching the darkness. 

Shinichi shrugged. "No idea; this is one place where logic only goes so far. Ran..... There's something else I've been wanting to tell you all night. I didn't before, and I should have." Beside him his younger self chuckled. Ran raised an eyebrow inquiringly. "Now what?" 

"Ummm..... you're beautiful. I didn't say that often enough, back when I could; so I wanted to tell you while I had the chance." She flushed; he could see it even in the darkness. Shinichi reached up to touch his fingertips lightly on either side of her face again, barely grazing the soft skin. From about waist level a voice spoke up: "You know, I think you should have said the 'I love you' bit and I should've said the 'you're beautiful' bit....." His eyes never left Ran's face as he mumured "Pipe down, pipsqueak." 

And he kissed her; and her arms slid around him, holding him fiercely as he had dreamed of them doing for an entire year. Not holding a child-body, not half-picking him up in an embrace, but just wrapping themselves around him tightly and caressing his back while their lips met in a sweetness that seemed to breathe light into his mind..... 

A rather disgruntled voice muttered "... I think I'm supposed to be too young to be watching this sort of thing..." 

..... and another voice, soft and lilting, spoke from the darkness, raising distant echoes: "Probably. It's about time, though....." 

The kiss broke off and all three turned to stare in the direction of the voice. A small figure stood there, barely visible in the blackness; she pushed her long hair back from her face as she stepped forward, still little more than a shadow. "Hello, Ran; hello..... me." 

And their eyes met----- 

********************************************* 

"AAAAAHHHH!!!" Shinichi bolted upright with a sharp cry. 

"What?!? What?!?" Dr. Agasa looked wildly around the clearing, squinting against the distant lights of the arcade. Shinichi blinked, rubbing at his eyes as reality reasserted itself. "....uhh.... nothing.... I was dreaming, I guess.... RAN!!" He pushed himself to his knees, trying to clear his vision enough to see. A huge knot seemed to form in his throat as he leaned over the young woman's prone form. "Is she..... Dr. Agasa, is--- is it over?" 

_*Please Ran, be okay....*_

The old man shrugged, worried lines creasing his face. "No idea; to all appearances, her body stopped reacting to the drug some time ago. She hasn't woken up yet, but the transformation seems to be..... well; see for yourself." 

Hesitantly Shinichi reached out a hand to brush the dark hair from Ran's face. _*She's..... smaller; her clothes are all baggy, just like mine were. And she's breathing okay.....*_ The chestnut-brown hair slid through his fingers like silk, revealing a pale, sleeping face: a little girl's face, round-cheeked and innocent. 

Shinichi felt the breath leave his lungs as if he had been hit by a hammer. _*Ran... Ran, just look at you. You look just like you did when we were kids--- I remember. Funny, I remember what you looked like, but not what I looked like.*_ She was... so _small._ Carefully he lifted one of her hands in his; the fingers were no longer than his own, the skin soft and child-smooth. _*So small.....*_

Then he felt movement, and the fingers tightened around his. In the pale face, dark eyes blinked, then fixed on his own. "Shin... ichi..." Her voice was higher in pitch now, but the inflection was all Ran's. 

Dr. Agasa leaned over them both, anxious. "Just stay down, Ran-chan--- don't strain yourself. Rest for a bit before you try to move---" Shinichi felt her grip his hand as, ignoring the scientist's advice, the child slowly pushed herself up to sit cross-legged between them. 

For that's what she was now: a child. Gropingly she ran her free hand across her face, feeling the unfamiliar features; her large eyes registered their uncertainty as she stared at her small hands, turning them over and over. "Different.... but the same..." she murmured, then paused in astonishment at the sound of her own voice. Ran shivered, pulling her hand free of Shinichi's to cross her arms over her chest, hugging her thin shoulders. 

Then she looked down and yelped in shock. The boy and the older man hovered, identical expressions of worry on their faces. "What?!? Girl, are you in pain? What's wrong?!?" Agasa half reached for her, then drew back. 

Ran stared down at her body, mouth open. "N-no.... just.... I didn't expect... I'm, um..... _flat..." Shinichi's jaw dropped._

The small girl looked up, then glared at them both through her tumble of dark hair. "Well--- it just didn't occur to me, that's all--- I mean, umm--- it's been a long time since I was....." Her voice trailed off in embarrasement, and she hid her burning face in her hands. 

After a moment, Dr. Agasa cleared his throat. "Are you in any pain, Ran-chan?" he asked gently. One eye peered through her fingers, and she shook her head. Then, dropping her hands, she waved an arm; the oversized sleeve flapped. "But... what am I going to do about clothes? These don't fit anymore---" 

The scientist harrumphed. "As for that, I actually have something that will help there. While you were, erm, sleeping, I opened the package that Ai left for you." He held out a small bundle of clothing. "It seems she foresaw this necessity....." Silently the girl took them from him; Shinichi growled to himself at Ai's temerity, but felt a certain relief that the problem was settled so easily. _*But when I get my hands on her, Ai's going to have some fast talking to do....*_ He clambered to his feet, and he and the doctor turned away to allow Ran privacy to change in. 

For a few moments the clearing held no sounds but the rustle of cloth, and the occasional muffled exclamation of dismay or surprise as the young-woman-turned-young-girl relearned how it felt to be wearing a child's body all over again. Dressed, she tapped Shinichi on the shoulder and tugged at Dr. Agasa's shirt-tail. 

Ran was..... _*She's--- cute. She's a cute little girl. I wonder how hard she'd hit me if I said that out loud?*_ Shinichi felt his jaw dropping again and shut it with an audible click. 

The child glared at them both, arms crossed and chin jutting rebelliously. Her dark hair fell in a slightly tangled flow to her waist, and her eyes were enormous against her pale skin, throwing back sparks from the lights of the arcade. The loose t-shirt and skirt fit her well enough, as did the simple sandles; Ran had shrugged her jacket from her old clothing back on, and now she thrust her hands into the ridiculously-large pockets. Something rustled inside the cloth, and with a puzzled expression she drew out a small, folded piece of paper. Spreading it in her fingers, Ran read the note aloud in her lilting little-girl's voice: 

_"My Dear Mouri-chan: I hope that you find uses for all my gifts to you this night as you deem appropriate. No doubt Shinichi is calling for my head on a platter by now, but really, I mean you both nothing but the best. I simply see no better outcome than the one which (I imagine) has come to pass; consider it a romantic gesture on my part. Please be assured that I will continue to seek out a cure for the misfortune which we three share. Truthfully, you are the most fortunate of us all: you chose your fate....... Haibara Ai"_

Ran stared down at the note for a long moment, expressionless; then a rather ironic smile crossed her face. "Strange woman. Girl. Whatever....." Shinichi took the note from her hands, reading it in the dim light; his face tightened and he snarled slightly as he crumpled the paper in his fist. "A _romantic gesture---"_ he growled. 

Ran sighed. "Well, maybe for her it is. The funny thing is, I think she really means what she said; she may be a manipulative little, um, witch, but..... she _did_ give me a choice." And she smiled a rather tremulous smile. "It's not like she shoved the capsule down my throat, you know." Her eyes met Shinichi's, and he at last smiled back reluctantly. "I--- yeah. Ran----- I wish---" 

She touched a finger to his lips. "Shhh. What's done is done. It's okay--- at least for the moment." Ran laughed; the sound was a little strained, but it was a real laugh. "Later, well, I don't know; you're going to have to help me a lot....." The girl held up her small hands to the faint light. "I feel so, so _small._ I had forgotton how it was; everything looks so _big."_ Her eyes traveled up Dr. Agasa's portly form, widening. "It's almost more like everything grew, instead of me shrinking..... until I look down at myself, that is." And she tucked her chin, staring across the length of her body to her toes. "My knees are so knobby--- and I look so _skinny."_

Shinichi found himself smiling. "Yeah; I remember--- All the proportions looked wrong at first; it was a real shock..... Hey-- how'd the note get in your pocket, anyway?" 

The little girl that had been Ran shrugged her small shoulders. "Must've been when Ai took the gun out of my pocket..." she said, walking carefully forward with her arms outstretched for balance. "This feels so weird---" 

There was the sound of two jaws dropping. _"Gun?!?"_ said Dr. Agasa and Shinichi simultaneously, horrified. Ran shrugged again. "She pulled a gun on me; I took it away. I let her have it back--- well, I didn't stop her when she took it, anyway." She regarded her companions with amusement as they gaped. Then her soft smile faded and she looked longingly towards the lights of the amusement park. "Can we go home now? This has been--- this has been the longest day in my life, and I'm _tired."_

Gathering their belongings, the three weary souls trudged across the clearing towards the main park. As they began to pass from the shadows into the bright lights of the midway, Ran paused for a second, turning to look back at a certain spot on the ground beside a wall. Her young face saddened, the eyes filling with a sorrow much older than her apparent years. Beside her the boy paused as well; "Regrets?" he said softly, a burden of guilt weighing the word heavily. 

Ran shook her head. "Not exactly.... it's just that--- somehow I feel like I'm leaving part of myself behind here. I guess I feel a little like a ghost; my old life ended _right there_, and I don't know what's waiting for me yet." She brushed at her eyes with the back of one small hand, then looked straight at Shinichi. "But no--- no regrets, not really. I made up my mind---- " and she smiled wanely. "You _know_ how stubborn I am---" 

He smiled wryly. "Yeah, I know; changing your mind is like trying to hold back the sea." As they approached the passing crowds, an older woman sidestepped two hurrying teenagers and bumped into Ran, sending her staggering sideways. "Oh, I'm so _sorry_, child! Are you alright, dear?" asked the woman with motherly concern, stooping. The girl looked up at the woman with amazement in her eyes. "Ummm, I'm fine....." 

The grey-haired woman smiled down at her and ruffled her hair with one hand. "Good-- I do apologize. Have a good time at the park, child!" And she bustled away into the crowd. 

Ran stood frozen, her wide eyes betraying her astonishment. "She..... she knocked me aside like I weighed no more than a _feather....."_

Beside her Shinichi's quiet voice spoke up. "That's something you'll have to get used to--- being small means having a lot less mass to use. I'm a--- we're--- _kids,_ Ran." Dr. Agasa moved up to stand protectively on her other side. 

She was very quiet during the long walk back to the bus depot; her large eyes kept trailing up the bodies of the people around her, measuring her height against theirs. Shinichi watched her carefully; he remembered how panicky he had felt during the first few days of his transformation--- how the world had seemingly _grown,_ become giant-sized and overwhelming and claustrophobically towering all around him. Love and worry surged so strongly in his heart that sometimes he felt as if it would burst, it pounded so hard for her. 

But... Ran said nothing; just stared, and stared, and stared. The bus arrived; Shinichi smiled inwardly as he remembered a very, very long walk home the previous year--- this was a _great_ improvement over walking. As they climbed up the stairs, Ran fumbled in her purse for her money, but Dr. Agasa reached over her head and calmly paid their fare. As she watched the attendant make his change, Shinichi nudged her; "That's one of the few perks to being a kid--- hardly anybody expects you to pay your way." he said, his face straight. Outraged, she turned to him with her mouth open--- then caught his expression and began to laugh. 

Across the bus, several people smiled at the sound of the clear, melodic laughter; it was a welcome music at the end of the long day. 

********************************************* 

"You know," said Shinichi conversationally as the bus grumbled through the darkened streets, "your Dad is going to _freak."_ Then he blinked and reconsidered. "No, on second thought, he's going to freak, and then he's going to kill me for getting you into this." A pause. "And maybe he ought to...." His small face darkened with an unchildlike expression of guilt as he stared out the window. 

On the other side of Ran Dr. Agasa spoke up. "Shin--- " the boy held up his hand warningly; "---Ah, Conan--- part of the blame is mine, surely. After all, I brought Ai to the park today, and I knew she was up to something, even if I didn't know what.it was." He chewed at his moustache, his small eyes downcast. 

Between them they heard an exasperated sigh. "Will you two heros _stop_ trying to blame yourselves for something that I chose to do voluntarily? Sh-- Conan, you're right; my Dad *IS* going to freak, and so's my Mom..... though I think she'll have less trouble with this than he will. And, _yes,_ he may very well want to kill you---" Shinichi winced. "But we'll just have to deal with that sort of stuff when it happens, hmmmm?" 

"Easy for you to say..." he muttered, visions of being tossed off the side of a bridge in a sack or some other method of Conan-elimination dancing vividly through his head. _*That's the problem about upsetting former policemen; they know lots of places to hide a body.....*_ It was going to be ugly, there was no denying it. All he could do was hope that shock would slow Mouri-san enough for him to dodge the worst of it until Ran had calmed her father down. At the very least, the look on the detective's face was going to be... _memorable._

Caught up in his thoughts, Shinichi/Conan started as he felt a hand slip into his. "Conan?" said the soft voice, the one that he was only now beginning to get used to. "I have to ask you--- do _you_ have any regrets? And I don't mean guilt for what I've done--- it was my choice, and that's all there is to it. But..... you're going to have to help me get used to this, and I'm going to be a, a liability to you, I guess..... But I just wanted us to be together. We're in the same place now, and neither one of us has to wait for the other to catch up anymore. Is that--- alright with you?" Shy dark eyes looked at his from the same level, no longer from above; Ran's little-girl face was serious as she stared at Conan through the flicker of the streetlamps. 

He looked down at their joined hands. "It's going to be hard, no doubt about that--- though I wouldn't exactly call you a 'liability'. But do I regret having you here with me?" He raised his eyebrows. "Are you _*kidding??* I won't be alone anymore._ I mean, except for feeling responsible for this and everything---" she cut him off there, her eyes kindling. "Conan--- if you keep bringing that up, I swear I'm going to thump you! _You're not responsible for my choices; I am._ So quit with the guilt, already!" 

He sighed, and some of the tension fell away from his body. After a minute or so of silence, he glanced back up at Ran's face, dimly lit by the city glare. "You're calling me Conan again." A smile crept across his face. 

The girl smiled back. "I've been calling you Conan for a year now..... guess I'm used to it." Then her smile widened into a real grin, and she leaned close to whisper in his ear. "But now I know who's behind that face, Shinichi..." she said very softly, and her fingers laced tightly between his. "I guess I'll have to pick out a new name too....." Ran paused for a moment, thinking; Conan watched her, wondering how she could still look so beautiful as a child. _*If anything, she's even more beautiful than she was; now I know what she'll be like in a few years--- I didn't know that when I really was a kid.*_

Beside them, Dr. Agasa pointedly turned his attention to the people around him, the traffic, anything except for the obviously private conversation occurring between his two companions. A small smile hid itself beneath his moustache. 

"Rin..." said the small girl experimentally, trying out the sound. _"Himitsu Rin."_ She turned to the boy, one eyebrow quirked. "So what do you think, hmmm?" 

Conan frowned, trying the name out on his tongue. "Himitsu Rin..... well, 'Rin' isn't too far from 'Ran'. so I guess it's alright.... but why 'Himitsu'? I've heard the name before, but I don't really recognize it." The bus bounced as it ran over a speedbump, making them both sway. 

Ran giggled. "A friend of mine lent me a book on the meaning of names a while back--- you know, one of those books that people who're going to have babies buy? She just acquired a new baby brother. Well, some of the names stuck in my mind..... 'Rin' means 'companion'; and 'Himitsu'........" 

"......'Himitsu' means _'secret'......"_

Conan groaned. 

Ran went on serenely. "There's one other reason for choosing 'Rin', oh Mister Great Detective. Tell me, *what* was the name of the only woman who outsmarted Sherlock Holmes?" 

The boy's eyes widened. "Irene Adler. I_rene...."_

Ran smirked. 

After a moment she continued airily. "I suppose I'll have to pass myself off as a cousin or something--- Mom and Dad can help us work that out; but Conan--- do I really _have_ to go back to grade school?" At his rather grim nod, she winced. "Can't be helped, I guess..... Oh well--- we had fun the first time around when we were there together; maybe it won't be so bad again." She held up their interlaced hands. "Look---" said Ran softly; "--- our hands are the same size....." 

The bus jolted and bumped its way around a curve; it was quite late. Conan stared out at the neon-lit sky and wondered what their homecoming would be like, and if he would survive it. The next few hours might well prove more perilous than the entire preceding year, if Mouri-san got his hands on him. 

But..... first, there was one more thing he had to ask Ran. He stared back down at their hands where they lay still intertwined together, gathering his courage. "Ran..... if Ai can't find a cure, and we have to--- to grow up all over again, will you....." 

"...will you stay with me? For the rest of our lives, I mean? And... even if she _does_ find a cure?" 

Silence. Ran stared at him, her mouth open. Dark eyes questioning, she seemed almost more surprised by his plea than by anything else that had happened during the entire day. And he watched her think, and he waited for her to speak... 

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_The longest hour in the world is the one that only takes a few *seconds* to pass, really--- the time between the most important question you will ever ask..... and the answer._

********************************************* 

Then she leaned across until they were nearly nose to nose, and rapped the side of his head with her knuckles. "I'd be pretty stupid not too, considering the lengths I've had to go to to _find_ you, you idiot." Her eyes were sparkling. "I'm not dumb enough to let you go _now._ And besides..... in the note that you gave to me with the flowers, you promised to _never leave me again._ I'm a stubborn woman, Kudo Shinichi. I drive a hard bargain." She smiled into his eyes. Leaning close, she kissed him softly on one cheek, a little girl's kiss. 

He drew a deep breath, feeling something inside him click into place--- something that had been spinning loose and aimless for an entire year, like a flywheel without a brake. Conan felt the head of the small girl beside him rest lightly on his shoulder, and he heard her whisper softly: "But you know, I'm going to miss seeing you as Shinichi, Conan..... it was nice to see your face again, even thought it wasn't exactly real....." 

The boy turned his head to stare down at the dark head that rested so easily against him; his brows were furrowed in astonishment for a second, but then they cleared and he laughed softly. "That's okay. Just look for me next time you dream, Ran; I'll be waiting. _All_ of me." 

In a cloud of exhaust, the bus hurried down the road towards its destination. 

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End file.
